Before I Let Go (Skyland, 1)

This was one of the first novels that I read after a long hiatus in reading with the specific intention of wanting to heal my heart space. I just finished it maybe a week ago, and I read this book with the intention of embarking on a journey to heal my heart space after a betrayal, a heartbreak, and a lifetime of neglect. I wanted to reconnect with my deep, insatiable, not just yearning for love, but belief in love. Love that is safe, love that is reciprocal, love that is built on a foundation of transparency and mutuality and trust and trustworthiness and passion and grace and endurance and undeniable commitment and covenant. I recommend that to any person, and especially any woman, who is recovering from heartbreak. It is a way to softly, gently, sweetly, intellectually, mentally and emotionally do exposure therapy to the idea of love. And this was the perfect book for me, because in wanting to believe in love again, especially in emotionally available, capable men who are able to return a God tier agape, unconditional, reciprocating, trustworthy, beautiful, covenant level love, Josiah is the blueprint for such a love. I loved these characters, and even though I have already read another book after this one, I'm still having a book hangover, I'm still in the book grief of missing the characters and missing the energy of the characters. They were very well written. And I love that the author, Kennedy Ryan, said in an interview that when so many people say the love the characters have for each other is unrealistic, or that the standard she is setting for women to believe in when it comes to men and love and relationships is unrealistic, she said no, I want that type of love to become the standard, especially for Black women, who have historically been expected to accept less and accept breadcrumbs and accept struggle love, especially now when it is historically time to change the narrative on Black love and make it healthy again. Make Black love healthy again. Make Black love committed again. Make Black love trustworthy again. Make Black love honorable again. Make Black love worthy of being publicly represented and reverenced again. And I love that she is doing that through her work of fiction, because ideas become seeds planted into how we move in society as a whole and at large, and I love books like this that plant the seeds and make Black women and readers change what they expect out of relationships, whether platonic or romantic or through family, raising the bar on what they know they deserve and what we are worthy of reciprocating and giving in relationship, because everything should be a mutual effort. But Josiah was the standard, if you want to be able to return your heart to a space where you can imagine a man who only has eyes for his wife, who doesn't have wandering eyes, who doesn't have a wandering heart, who is sure that when he decided to love his wife he wanted only her, and who never lost attraction for her no matter how many babies her body gave him and how much it changed, and as they got older his love continued to grow and mature and ripen for his wife. Even after, spoiler alert, they go through a divorce, because this is a second chance romance, he still loves her afterwards, and even through his immense pain of being rejected, because yes, Yaz is the one who asked for the divorce, he was still fighting his feelings of still feeling committed to her. And if that is not what every woman has ever yearned for or desired when it comes to a magical, soulmate, passion rich, emotionally intelligent love, then I don't know what is. And the rest of the book, of course, all of the characters are beautifully written. As someone who has struggled lifelong with depression, I loved the depiction of Yaz's depression and how Kennedy Ryan was able to illustrate how depression can cause physical aches. And I love that it also showed how, despite them trying to keep their marital problems between them, of course the kids absorbed that. That reminded me so much of my childhood, you know, parents just assume that kids aren't smart, but kids are like sponges, they pick up on everything, they have intuition, and they are a lot smarter than we give them credit for. So her incorporating the domino effect of how divorce and grief affect the children even when you are trying to protect them, that was beautifully illustrated and written in the book. And the friendship between Yaz and her friends, you know, every relationship in the book, even Yaz's relationship with Josiah's deceased aunt, was passionate, and she was grieving her as well. The memories that they conjured of her, it was just a very heart open book that showed reverence and appreciation for the living and the dead and for what was lost, and it didn't try to rush through the grieving process or gloss over the people who weren't there anymore. It kept memories alive, which I believe is a necessity and beautiful when it comes to the concept of family and holding on and keeping hope alive and making our loved ones immortal in our hearts. I loved all of the layers of every character, and yes, I loved how courageous and open and honest and vulnerable and raw Yaz was when she finally decided that she was going to forgive herself for the mistake she made when she was depressed. And I love how it showed that depression steals so much from your life, and it hijacks your mind and your spirit and your soul with so much darkness that it can even erode and disconnect you from things and people that you love deeply, and you cannot see past the black and white that it reduces you to and the extremes that it forces you to see through, and you can't see hope, and you can't see reconciliation, and you can't see any point in living or any point in trying. And you can stay in these depression induced loops of thinking and grieving for years before you're able to finally wake up from it and realize that so many years of your life have been stolen by it, and you do have to realize, despite you being in a very altered state that you could not fight through and were wishing for death from, that when you finally get past it, even though you didn't intend to, a lot of damage was done. So I love how that was depicted in the story, and how Yaz went through a journey of having to forgive herself for the mistake she made in her marriage and with her children and even losing their baby. And I love that we're able to be with her in her skin as she forgives herself and conjures up the courage to fight for her marriage even after divorce, and puts her heart on the line and lays all of her wants and needs and desires out to Josiah and pursues him and earns his love and his heart and his trust back, even after two years of being divorced, so that they're able to reconcile fully and completely. It's a beautiful feel good story that, although it gives you a happy ending, doesn't spare you any of the messy middle that is required to get to that happy ending, especially in a second chance romance where a divorce took place. So it will have you smiling and giggling and crying and it takes you through every spectrum of emotion, and it's delicious. It's sensual. It's honest. It's beautiful. It's heart wrenching. And most of all, it will definitely make you believe in love again, and especially raise your standards on what you deserve and desire out of romance, out of family, out of friendship, out of covenant, and it helps you to believe in and know that you're capable of being a good partner and having a good partner. Kennedy Ryan definitely set a standard here of helping women reach higher for the type of partners they attract into their lives, and have a bigger hand in the type of love story that they allow to exist in their world. So it was beautifully written. I had a wonderful time. This is definitely the type of book that I would want a sequel to. I loved every second, my heart still misses these characters, and it's something that I would read again for sure. ✨

An incredible tale of loss, heartbreak, depression, healing, laughter, triumph, and unfailing love. I absolutely loved Josiah and Yas story. Couldn’t find myself putting it down. This was my first read by Ryan. But you had better believe I will be finding more.

I loved Yasmen and Josiah’s story and how beautifully it showed love, grief, healing, and finding your way back to each other. Some parts hit me hard, but the ending made the emotional roller coaster completely worth it!

Before I Let Go is the kind of book that makes you slow down and take your time, and I’m so glad I did. It was filled to the brim with emotion, and every chapter seemed to bring a different perspective. The story was wholesome while still dealing with so many real-life challenges that a marriage can face, constantly leaving you wondering what would happen next. The emotions truly lifted off the page—happiness, sadness, anger, uncertainty, love, and hope. You don’t just read what the characters are going through; you feel it with them. All the way to the very last word, this book was masterfully written. An emotional and unforgettable read!

+🛑SPOILERS🛑 ⭐️: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️/5 ONE OF MY TOP READS OF 2022! I read this book as a buddy read and started the book on Saturday night. It's Monday afternoon and I finished it! To say this book is amazing, sad, beautiful, loving, and more is an understandment. First of all I love the name Josiah and Yasmen! I just had to throw that out there 🤣. Second when the book first started I am glad it started with Yasmen being happy with herself and loving who she is. It was a journey still for her and I enjoyed the aspect of therapy and how it has helped her. She was a great mother, business women, and lover who just lost her way. I liked that she told Josiah she never stopped loving him, but she needed to learn to love herself. I've heard so many people say that and I didn't know what it meant until recently. It's the truth, though I didn't agree divorce was the right decision, something Yasmen admitted. She needed the separation and I just wish her and Josiah would have been able to communicate that without having to divorce. Kennedy Ryan has a way of writing men that you fall in love with. Josiah has literally stolen my ❤️! He was everything you want in a man. A great father, loving, sweet, and supportive. One thing I loved the most about him is taking accountability. Yes, Yasmen asked for the divorce, however, he was being emotionally resistant and never truly showed emotion for the lose of his aunt and son. That affected Yasmen who didn't have support and felt alone. Even denying going to therapy which in the long run he found to help him and his family. The scene when he was speaking to his therapist and finally let his tears go was beautiful to see. Society has set into men they have to be strong and withhold there emotions, but in reality you are setting them up to suffer silently which leads to worse circumstances mentally. I relate to this book on the spectrum of therapy. I was resistant at first because I thought people would label me crazy and more. But, after going it had helped me so much. I now have methods of breathing to calm myself down and turn to positivity at my darkest times. Before I Let Go is about second chances and finding love again that has never went away. Also, anxiety and depression which millions of people suffer from on the daily. Not to mention Si and Yas kids were a true telling of the story as well and I liked the way Kennedy explained ways divorce can affect children especially ones who are older. Deja I understand her anger with her mother and I was proud to see them make up at the end. Even Yasmen holding herself accountable and talking to her daughter. The son Seem is a son I would dream to have! However, this book is a solid ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ for me and I recommend everyone read this book. It respectfully explores the topic of grief, mental health, and more. Also, shows therapy in the positive light that it is! Read this book because you will not regret it. I look forward to the next book in the series!

I enjoyed reading this book from beginning to end. The author perfectly captured the awkwardness, vulnerability, toxicity, pain, and joy that is true love. Josiah and Yasmen experienced the kind of love and mutual attraction that is mostly seen when captured on the big screen. As a hopeless romantic, reading their story, made me believe in love once again.

I loved the depth of the story line, close match to reality. I can't wait to binge read book 2 &3. Josiah darling you're the most model husband of all time 😝🤭

I can across a post about this book being made into a movies and decided to read it. I’m so happy I did. Such a beautifully written book. I loved the changing perspectives throughout the book. In relationships it’s so easy to lose sight of where the other person is coming from especially when there hurt and trauma. Kennedy Ryan so beautifully captured real marriage dynamics with Below I Let Go. Highly recommended.

This book took care of me. I don’t know if that makes sense. I don’t know how to explain it, so I won’t.

Well...It's been a few days since I finished this read and I am still trying to process it. Where to even begin...like always, GAME-CHANGER!!! It was stunning. The definition of second chances brings forth a whole new meaning to me now. Again, Kennedy didn't tie this up in a pretty bow; she was authentic to her characters and honest with the situation. It barred some pretty heavy topics like grief, depression, stillbirth, and the collapse of a marriage, but also held some lightness with laughter, happiness, and utter joy. It was just brilliant. I'm genuinely speechless; all I want is to wrap Yasmin and Josiah up in a great big hug and tell them, I'm so proud of you both. I swear, I feel healed and I wasn't even a character in this book, lol, like...how? I'm just in love. Hats off to Kennedy Ryan, she is the BEST in the business and, next to my mama, my favourite HUMAN of all time. The lady needs to be graced on every shelf of every home, in every syllabus at every university, and 'our' voice to not only normalize mental health BUT also to create CHANGE. She is hands down the brightest ray of sunshine, the BEST teacher I have ever had, and one in a million.

Another outstanding novel from Kennedy Ryan. Emotions and feelings are all over there. It is just beautiful how she described all the emotions, the characters. She really know how to go deep. Perfect second chance book. I could not drop the book until I finished.

I don’t usually write long reviews, but Before I Let Go deserves every word. This book broke me open in the softest, most healing way. It’s not your typical second-chance romance — it’s quieter, deeper, and achingly real. What I loved most? The characters don’t perform for you. They grow for themselves. No unnecessary drama, no over-explaining pain. Just two people learning how to carry love and grief in the same hands. The heroine felt like someone I’d admire in real life — calm, layered, strong in a gentle way 🧘‍♀️. She gave space to breathe, and that space made all the difference. Kennedy Ryan writes like she sees into your private sorrows. She doesn’t rush the healing — she respects it. That meant the world to me. I closed the book and just sat there... silent, grateful, and honestly a little changed 💔✨. If you’re in a season of healing or trying to understand what love means after life cracks you open — please read this. It’s not loud, but it’s powerful. Soul-deep.

Lovely story, I recommend it